Why I Love...Being a [Black] Woman

I started a new book, Shifting: The Double Lives of Black Women in America by Charisse Jones and Kumea Shorter-Gooden. It discusses the multiple roles black women have to play in society. This book started as a research project to find out how we deal with and handle those roles. Although I just started, I know this will be a page turner for me. To start, the authors define what it means to shift. Shifting defines how we transform from one role to the other. I think we all do it, whether black or white, male or female. But black women have an added dimension because it is often said we have two strikes: being black and female. I remember the book, The Bluest Eye by Toni Morrison where the main character wishes she had blues eyes and blond hair and wonder if that is the dream of many little Black girls. I can't relate to that story because I never once had that dream. I've always been proud of who I am and where I came from and try to teach my children the same.

When I think about why that is so, my first thought is that I love being a woman! Sure I complain about the monthly visitor and the pains of childbirth, but I feel so blessed and fortunate to have given birth, a giver of life. I have always embraced my femininity and wonder why being masculine is the in thing for teen girls now. I often have to do a double take while at work, girls with the sagging pants (as if not bad enough on the boys), hats, big boots or tennis shoes. I try not to judge, but good grief...I love to pamper myself. I know some men who pamper themselves with weekly haircuts and shaves, manicures and pedicures, but I love the fact that I don't have to explain my self love.

Being a Black woman is a challenge, but a welcome one for me. I hate the stereotypes, but some are justified. Yes, we have an attitude, but we've had to fight for everything...our freedom, our children, our families, our lives! We are strong and we are survivors. As I think of the women in my family, I see so much diversity...some are meek, some are aggressive, some are homemakers, some are pace setters, some are spiritual, but whatever they are and do, they are fantastic at it.

Black women come in so many shades and sizes...from Halle Berry to Mo'Nique ; from Carol Mosely Braun to Michelle Obama ; from Angie Stone to Beyonce. We are everywhere and our presence is known and felt. Like our brothas, we are loved yet feared. We are trendsetters...from our cornrows to our afros ; from our hip huggers to our stilettos. People stare, but often try to imitate. We don't care what people think of our style, because it's just that...ours!